Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Postscript - 21st June 2010

Well, did the Princess experience put us off cruising?

Not on your life! We've been to Save'n'Sail this week, and the next one's booked. No more big ships for us, we're returning to Fred Olsen's Braemar. And Harold will be with us, so watch out for more adventures from the Famous Five!

Janet

Friday, May 21, 2010

Under the Stars







Each generation of cruise ships has bigger and better ‘attractions’. The way the UK market is moving I assume a full sized greyhound racing track is now on the drawing board. The Grand Princess was designed in the 90’s for the American market. At that time, the huge open air cinema screen hanging over the main pool was probably the dog’s dangly bits.

This attraction is called ‘Movies under the Stars’ and I imagine it works well in the Caribbean. In May in the Mediterranean “Movies if you’re Hard Enough” would be a more accurate title. Last night, faced with Bernie Flint at the Theatre (he’s the one who won Opportunity Knocks) we decided that it would be preferable to spend a couple of hours on a wind swept deck.

After the formal dinner we changed into more appropriate clothing and headed for the pool. It’s a good time to get a sun lounger on the Grand Princess and we were soon lying under our complimentary blankets trying to spot stars through the cloud cover.

The story of the film, Happy Bones, was difficult to follow. My ears were freezing but when I covered them with my woolly hat I couldn’t hear the sound. I finally settled for one in and one out and sod the stereo. Julie was the first to crack. After about an hour she bravely whispered “I’m going inside, I might be some time” “Me too”, “Me too”, “Me too”, came the three, almost simultaneous, replies.

Dave C

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Postscript on the Virus

The last few days have been lovely - fluffy Mediterranean seas and blue skies. Even Gibraltar looked good in the sunlight. I’m now chilled enough to finish the blog about Norovirus. Cruisers need to read this - others can, if they wish, look away now.

I went to the Pursers office to mention, politely, that I didn’t think they should charge for poisoning Janet. I would have had a better chance of winning an argument with a Speak Your Weight machine. After a lifetime working for government and large organisations I can spot a corporate policy at 100 yards in thick fog. The Princess Line (sorry) on the virus is – IT’S ALL THE PASSENGER’S FAULT

Since then I’ve pieced together the bones of what I assume is now Carnival’s worldwide policy on what has to be called a Gastrointestinal Virus. This implies a normal tummy bug frequently found ashore as opposed to the word Norovirus which has become associated with cruise ships. The spin is that passengers bring this virus on board just like they bring on board colds and verukas. Because the passengers don’t wash properly they then infect each other despite the crew’s valiant attempts to stop the spread of the Noro - sorry gastrointestinal virus.

To reinforce this position the Captain reads out a daily ‘update’ which was obviously written by corporate lawyers with minimal input from human beings. This stresses that that there has been an “increase in the occurrence of the virus” - not an outbreak because, like death and taxes, this bug is always with us. Numbers are not announced unless the daily “increase” is less than twenty.

From inadequate data, I‘ve extrapolated that we’ve had in excess of 300 cases. In a cafe in Ajaccio, Saint Julie was helping the family on the next table translate jambon & fromage on the menu (the demographic isn’t quite what we’d hoped for) when they told us that they, and their two children, (obviously educated at home but not in French) had all been ill for eight days! The couple on the next table then joined in to describe their illness so, from this random sample, I may have underestimated the total.

The rest of the scam goes something like this - You have to report any incident of gastrointestinal virus. If you do someone from the Medical Department will have to talk to you. This is what is called a consultation and everyone knows that medical consultations have to be paid for. You will automatically be given anti diarrhoea tablets because they’ve got several crates to shift at $10 a pack.

Finally the really brilliant bit - By the middle of the cruise everyone on board has twigged that reporting the virus will cost you around $100 a pop. The number of reported cases then drops day by day until, amazingly, as we near Southampton the “increase in occurrence” approaches zero. On turnaround the ship is given a special deep clean to be absolutely sure that the virus has been eradicated so if it appears again on the next cruise it can only be the fault of dirty passengers.

Carry on Cruising?

Dave C

Wednesday 19th May Gibraltar




Didn’t get to the disco last night after all, as we discovered that a ventriloquist was performing in the Vista Lounge, and how could we possibly bear to miss that!

We’ve been in Gibraltar today, and as I type this we are sailing through the Straits, dolphins all around the ship, and Morocco tantalisingly close by. We had breakfast together again this morning and then all went shopping. The two Js went in lots of jewellery shops before Julie managed to find a beautiful gold bracelet. The Daves were very patient and fully deserved the pint of beer we treated them to at the end of the morning. We walked as far as the Trafalgar Cemetery, hoping to see the graves of those whose died in the battle, but it was surrounded by roadworks and the gates were padlocked, so our long walk was in vain.

It’s been a very hot day. We bought newspapers in town and were thrilled to see that England is also basking in glorious sunshine.

Janet xx

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Tuesday, 18th May 2010 - At Sea



The ship was rocking and rolling last night after we’d sailed away from Ajaccio. We had dinner in the restaurant and then tried to find a quiet spot for a drink or two, eventually settling for seats in the Atrium where a Canadian was playing the piano and crooning a la Sinatra. Julie was first to make a move for bed (and the sea-sick pills) but was fairly closely followed by the rest of us. Janet had a perfect night’s sleep, thanks to one of her magic blue sleeping pills!

Awoke this morning to another beautiful day, so we all met for breakfast and then went our separate ways for a day’s sunbathing/shade-seeking. Julie and Janet attended a card-making class early in the afternoon, but it was rubbish, so we left after a very short time, and went and had a cappuccino.

Tonight is our second formal evening, and at the moment the seas are quite calm, so I hope we can manage to stay out a bit later than last night! Movie Under the Stars tonight is ‘Avatar’ but I don’t really fancy that. Anyway, we’ve still not investigated the ship’s disco, which is held in the ‘spoiler’ high above the back of the ship. Better go practice my moves now... just in case.

XX
Janet

Monday, May 17, 2010

Ajaccio this morning

What a Difference a Day Makes

Sunday

The less said about yesterday the better! As Julie has already mentioned, bad weather prevented us from docking at Naples, and so we missed the trip to Pompeii which we’d been looking forward to for months. So – once again – we spent much of the day in the cabin, this time watching the rolling seas and enormous waves, much more like the Atlantic than the Mediterranean.

The choice of entertainment last night was somewhat limited as new artistes were due to embark at Naples, so instead of the advertised Ventriloquist (honestly!) we went to one of the bars where we listened – reluctantly at first – to an amazing Hungarian 5 piece band. Piano, two violins, double bass, and accordion! They were wonderful, and we all agreed that Harold would have loved to have been there. Cheers H., we’ve been thinking of you and hope you’re having a wonderful time in Montegnegro

Monday

This morning we awoke to clear blue skies and a glorious view from our window. We are in Ajaccio, Corsica, and have had a wonderful day. The four of us met for breakfast in one of the formal dining rooms, and then left the ship to explore the town. We sat on the beach for a while, Dave C* even venturing into the sea for a paddle, then wandered through the streets looking at the shops and marvelling at the number of pharmacies that one small town can support! Found a nice cafe/bar overlooking the bay, and ordered ‘quatre bieres’, which were so refreshing that we decided to stay there for lunch and another quatre.

It’s late afternoon and we’re about to sail away. The sun is still shining, so we hope that the next few days will bring more decent weather and happy times to blog about!

Janet
xx