Design Issues

I’m interested in cruise ship design. In my career I’ve done hospital wards, prison cells and accommodation for laboratory mice so I understand most of the problems. If you’re wondering, the mice always get the best conditions although there is, of course, a catch.

During Janet’s confinement I’ve had time to study our cabin. It’s one of the best we’ve ever had with spacious sleeping and sitting areas. As the ship was designed in America, the problem of “where do you put the telly” has been solved with a flat screen TV for each area. The British solution usually involves hinged brackets. The American influence can also be seen in the fierce air conditioning and the myriad of visible and concealed lights. The ship must have a high PBPNM rating (polar bears per nautical mile) but, for the Cruise Lines, global warming is not a problem. Melting ice caps mean more seas to sail and new places to visit and it gets a lot easier to park in Venice.

The cabin’s plan is long and thin so it’s on one of the lower accommodation decks where the ship is at its widest. Our balcony is open to the sky and the balconies above rack back from the front of our sitting room. This arrangement means that the balconies on this deck get more sun but the occupants are on display and probably on YouTube if they don’t behave themselves.

The layout means that noise on the balconies is the only aspect of the design where the naval architect said sod it and went off to have lunch. Our next door neighbours are a couple with a young daughter. It’s like living next to Orville the Duck. At first she sounds cute, then she sound annoying, then you wish you had an Uzi machine gun. This gamut of emotions takes less than five minutes.

All things considered however, it’s a very nice cabin and it’s just a shame that we’ve seen a bit more of it than we’d planned. Janet’s release papers have just come through so we’re off for a walk in the rain.

Dave C